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Thursday, 19 July 2012 06:25

Get your daughter ready for married life

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Motherhood does not start and end at bringing up children into well behaved adults. At a point they must leave home and, sometimes, permanently too. Here are some of the things your daughter must know before getting married. Shopping for the perfect dress, filling out invitations, finding the perfect wedding setting - all of these are part of a girl’s dream of getting married. Before the big day, though, there are a few things you may want to discuss with your daughter.

By the time your little girl gets married she probably already knows all about the birds and the bees. One thing she may not know, though, is how difficult it is to live with another person. Although everything is lovely in the beginning, things can go sour very quickly, if your daughter doesn’t know that the marriage will be a challenge, to say the least.


Talk to your daughter about difficulties facing all relationships. She should know that it will take patience, forgiveness and understanding to keep her relationship solid. If she’s the type that gets her feelings hurt easily, explain to her that sometimes her husband will hurt her feelings even if he doesn’t mean to. She should be prepared to let some comments and situations go.

On the other hand, communication is very important, so your daughter should know that she and her partner need to talk often, and openly, about any situation. Harboring bad feelings towards your mate, without their knowledge, only leads to trouble down the road.

Yelling, screaming or bossing her mate around will not help your daughter have a happy relationship. Talk to her about giving her husband trust and freedom. Many women and men too, fall into a pattern of trying to control their mates but this causes additional troubles in the long run.

Men love to hear things like “I love you”, “I need you”, or “I want you”. These phrases reassure a guy that he is important in his wife’s life. A man that feels needed and loved tends to be more content than the one that is hollered at and called names.

Tell your daughter to pick and choose arguments with her husband wisely. If every issue results in an argument, the husband is less likely to pay attention to the points the wife is making than if arguments are seldom. It is easier to wipe the whiskers from the sink, for example, than to make a big issue about it. At another time, remind hubby that he shouldn’t leave the whisker chore to you, but do so in a kindly manner. Making a big fuse over every little thing will only cause him to tune you out.

Remind your daughter to appreciate her husband for who he is. Maybe he doesn’t choose the perfect Christmas present but he does at least select one. Be considerate of his feelings when you feel let down. He probably doesn’t even know what he did to upset you.

Advise your daughter not to let her appearance go. Many women settle into the marriage and suddenly they’re wearing ratty bedroom slippers and shirts with stains. No matter how old a man gets he still wants to have a woman that looks good. Although it’s okay to put off polishing your nails for a day or so past when they need it, letting yourself get to the point of repulsion is a huge strike against your relationship.

Talk to your daughter about things she should never do, including playing girlish games, insulting him when she’s angry, giving him the silent treatment, or flirting with other men in his presence or elsewhere at all. These things can damage any relationship beyond repair.

Keep romance alive. Surprising your guy with little gifts or thoughtful gestures can get and keep  his attention. Showing him you love him, no matter what, will keep most men coming back.

If your daughter is getting married soon, put off the shopping and wedding plans until you’ve talked to her, in a real manner, about her future relationship. The advice you give her could keep her and her husband happy for the rest of their lives.

Read 2248 times Last modified on Tuesday, 18 August 2015 18:12